Visualeyes

I took a big step today. I called a company that makes white canes and ordered my own. By just using the one my mobility instructor brings each session it means I only have to confront getting to the point where I need to use a cane, once a week. Having one, makes it harder to avoid.

I know myself well. I can sabotage my life without too much difficulty, and I can usually rationalize my way in or out of most decisions. So if there's something difficult to do, and I don't really want to do it, I need to narrow the parameters. That way I'm aimed toward the correct decision, not the one of least resistance.

That's why I paid for priority shipping so I'll have the cane early next week, like Tuesday. You see, Saturday next week, I'm going to the beach with a friend. That would be the perfect place and opportunity to practice using my cane. (Not actually on the beach, silly!!!) It's a small town that we can walk to from our condo. No one knows me there, thus eliminating the uncomfortable-being-seen issue and the embarrassment factor. And the friend I'm going with is one of my closest, dearest friends and one of my greatest supporters. I know she will cheer me on and revel in my accomplishments with me. It's the perfect set of conditions; the cane will be there, so I'll just have to use it.

And of course, by telling all of my wonderful blogger buddies and followers, I can't wiggle out of it :-D  (I have to be relentless with myself otherwise I adopt the attitude I heard way too often in my classroom.....do I have to??? Can you hear the whiny voice that goes with it? 

Surely the woman who took on the city of Dunwoody to get a proper sidewalk, and is taking on the leadership of Atlanta's mass transit organization to prevent removal of her much needed bus route, and handle using a cane for a week?

Do I have to???????